It's Raining It's Pouring

Its raining today .... I think this is about the first day it has rained all summer. We had a great time camping again the past couple of nights and went to a family reunion where more of our relatives were able to meet the boys. We have plans to head up north to the cottage but not sure when. Paul and Randy are doing great. We are a little worried about September and how all of us will cope with more changes ..... hopefully we will be able to get into a routine that will work for all of us. Paul seems to be excited about school but I'm not sure that he understands that Mommy and Daddy are not going with him :(

I am going to miss them alot .... its been a great opportunity to spend so much time together as a family. Hopefully we can find a way to do it again sometime before they reach the age where they want us to drop them off at school a block away so that their friends don't see us.

Its raining really hard.

Camping

The four of us camping at Mikisew Provincial Park :)

Time is Flying By

So far we are having a great summer ... one of the hottest on record here. We took off for a week camping with the boys and had a great time swimming, feeding chipmunks and roasting marshmallows. Wendy is looking forward to going back to work more than me I think ... I could get used to the stay at home dad idea I think. We are getting into a bit of a routine and things are going well ... will be hard in September when we are apart from them so much.

Happy Birthday Paul

We celebrated Paul's 4th birthday on Saturday (and Sunday too) ... it was insane .... had a few kids over on Saturday and cousin Charles stayed overnight until Sunday. It was very hot so we spent most of the time in the kids pool and playing with water guns. Turned into an accidental Batman theme party ... Pauls entire room is now decorated with Batman stuff. He is really enjoying a Batman scooter but he has not quite got the hang of it yet. We were worried about Randy being jealous of all of the presents to Paul but he seemed ok.

Suprising how "normal" it all seems ... feels like we have had them all along :)

Fathers Day

Walk a little slower daddy, said a child so
small. I'm following in your footsteps and
I don't want to fall.

Sometimes your steps are very fast,
Sometimes they're hard to see;
So walk a little slower, Daddy,
For you are leading me.

Someday when I'm all grown up,
You're what I want to be;
Then I will have a little child
Who'll want to follow me.

And I would want to lead just right,
And know that I was true;
So, walk a little slower, Daddy,
For I must follow you.

Proud Parents

Our boys finished their first set of swimming lessons today. We picked up their progress cards and they both did great. They have come along way from the first day of lessons ... Randy wouldn't even get in the water at first. Its kind of a neat feeling to be so proud of them. The weather is great and we had a picnic lunch outside .... lots of fun. They both seem really happy.

Victoria Weekend

We had a action packed Victoria Day Weekend. Wendy's brother Tim and Family came up for a visit on Saturday. All of the cousins had a great time playing together. On Sunday Paul and I went for a bike ride in the park ... we cycled along for a while and to our suprise we were stopped by the police ... they had rifles and asked us how we got into the park. We found out that there had been a bear siting and the police and closed the entire park off to everyone (except us somehow). Anyways they eventually captured the bear and everything was ok.

Today we went to a farm. The boys got to ride ponies, milk a cow, ride on a hay wagon, chase after chickens, roosters, ducks, emus, horses, cows, goats, sheeps, pigs etc. etc. They had a great time ... I think their favorite part was talking about all of the different types of poopies all over the ground .... gross!

Our boys on Mothers Day ... we are so proud. 

The Morning After (Mothers Day)

Yesterday was amazing ... Wendy had a perma-grin all day long. We went to a Mothers Day tree planting thing at the park in the morning. Wendy planted four trees with the boys. The local newspaper was there and took their picture ... we will wait to see whether they make the front page :)

Wendy's mother and two of her brothers came over with their kids in the afternoon. Paul and Randy played with their cousins and seemed to have a great time. BBQd hamburgers and corn on the cob ... just had a blast.

It felt like the boys have been here all along.

The Boys Are Asleep

The boys are sleeping .. whenever we are feeling a little overwhelmed you just watch them when they are sleeping .... angels. Things are going great .. swimming lessons every Tuesday ... lots of bike rides and playing at the park. Tried to fly a kite today but it was a little too windy and the kite broke. They are definately testing their boundaries with us .... especially Paul .... it seems like they are responding to us and as long as we are consistent they seem to get it.

Our Boys Are Home

We brought our boys home on March 21st, 2005. What an amazing experience ... our daily lives have suddenly changed so dramatically. I just finished putting out the Easter Eggs and baskets .. can't wait for them to wake up this morning they will be so excited.

Yesterday I went out and bought my oldest son (it stills seems strange to say that) his first 2 wheel bicycle (a big boy bike as we call it) with training wheels. He loved it. We also got them there first wagon. Yesterday we went out to a Maple Syrup Festival where the boys got to go for ride in a hot air ballong, ride on ponies, a trail ride on a wagon with horses and taste maple syrup. We had a great time.

I'm sure there will be many challenges but just hearing them both call out for Daddy makes it all worth it.

Wendy and Steve at Sawyer 

Third Visit - Things Are Really Moving Now

We were up north with the boys again last weekend. Had a great time with them and everything went really well. Stayed at a really nice lodge ... much better then the regular hotel. So much to do before they arrive ... the placement date has been moved up to March 21st.

Things are really happening fast now ... I just hope we can get things ready in time.

Second Visit

We had our second visit with the boys last weekend. It went really well but it sure is tiring. Lots of driving and lots of energy required to keep up with these two. We had them overnight on Saturday and everything went fine. The kids got alot more sleep than I did ... everytime they made any kind of noise I couldn't help but look up to make sure that they were ok. We went ice fishing and pulled them around on the sleigh ... Paul and I went to the pool for a few hours and had a great time.

Tried to go out to a restaurant with them a couple of times ... didn't work out to well. Its hard to get them to do anything for more than about 10 minutes. Can't wait until next time ... the plan is to have them for the entire weekend.

Went out mini-van shopping last night :)

An Amazing Experience

I can't even think of any words to describe the experience of meeting our boys for the first time last weekend. Having them greet us at the door by jumping into our arms as their new Mommy and Daddy was an amazing thing. I don't know what I expected from the first visit but I was really suprised by how well we seemed to fit together.

I was struck by how much they needed us. All along I have been thinking somewhat selfeshly about the whole experience. I wanted a family so bad and I wanted the experience of being a Dad ... I never really thought that I was helping anyone else. It really struck me that the boys need us as much as we need them ... I feel so lucky to have been chosen to be given this chance ... it also feels really good to be in a position to be able to provide them with a good home where they will be loved unconditionally. I feel like I already have a different perspective on why I'm here and what really matters. My experience at work has changed some how ... even just this first week was different .... I felt like it had more meaning .... like I need to get the job done .... I now have the responsibility to provide for these two boys and my family ... it feels good.

I really enjoyed watching my wife interact with them. She has been waiting for so long for this chance to be a Mom and now that she is one everything I thought about how she would be has come true ... she was so good with them. The boys are great kids, full of energy, healthy, smart and loving. We had so much fun with them and I think they had a great time with us as well.

Even after just the first visit it was very difficult to leave them behind when we went back home. I'm preparing for this to get harder every visit. I don't think they are ready to come with us quite yet ... but I know the day will come when they will not understand why we are leaving without them. The next few months are going to be very exciting but very difficult at the same time.

One funny tidbit ... the boys think we live at the hotel. We had them on our own for a few hours and we dropped in to our room to get a few things. Never thought anything of it but after a few minutes the oldest one says "Where's my room?". They are definatelly a little confused and it will take some time for them to understand.

I can't wait to get them home.

Getting Close Now

Its 10 to 7 on a Sunday morning and I'm sitting here updating this Blog that no-one is reading. Only a few days now before we meet our new sons for the first time. We are leaving for Elliot Lake on Thursday for our first meeting with them over the weekend. Feeling really excited and extremely nervous at the same time ... will we be good enough for them. Will they run towards us or run away ... who knows? We were trying to pick out a toy to take up to them when we first meet them .... nothing I saw seemed good enough .... how can you possibily find that perfect gift. I am already starting to think of them as my own .. we have their picture up on the fridge and I can't help but look at it everytime I pass. I am constantly wondering what they are doing at a given moment.

Also thinking about how our lives are going to change ... it will be awhile before we can enjoy a quiet dinner/evening together. We will have to try to make time for ourselves sometime. Time seems to be passing by slowly as we wait for our first meeting.

Have talked to them on the phone already and have heared those little voices say "Hi Mommy" and "Hi Daddy" ... wow ... that was unexpected. We were worried so much at first about how the kids would adjust ... now its starting to seem like its us that will have to do the adjusting.

Hold on to your hats ....

Wow things are really happening now. We found out that we were matched up with two boys (ages 2 and 3) that we found out about at the adoption resource exchange. We have not met them yet but we expect to sometime early in the new year. They are so cute .. and they seem like they are doing really well. These kids are going to turn our lives upside down and inside out .. we can hardly wait. They seem like the perfect match for us ... lots of energy ... and ready to get involved in all kinds of activities. I can hardly wait to get them up north to the lake .... I just know that they will love it. It is such a good feeling to know that we have put all the pain behind us and we are moving on.

I Feel Like Shit

I feel like shit today for some reason. I took the day of work and didn't do anything. Lazy ass. I had alot of stuff to do but just didn't feel like doing anything ... not idea why. I have curling tonight so maybe that will help get me out of this funk.

Good news on the adoption front .. we found out that we are one of three couples being considered for the two boys (2 and 3). We meet with the social worker to find out more on Monday afternoon.

We have also been shortlisted for the set of 3 siblings (2 boys and a girl). OMG would they ever turn our lives upside down.

Excited but a little scared too .... life sometimes just doesn't lead you down all the paths that you expect.

Still waiting

Last couple of weekends have been busy. Two weekends ago we spent the entire weekend at an adoption retreat training weekend. We spent the entire weekend with 6 or 7 other couples learning about adoption. It was very emotional and at times difficult. We learned alot about potential problems with adoptive families. Many adopted children have alot of issues to deal with.

This past weekend we spent the entire weekend at something called the Adoption Resource Exchange. We expressed interested in four sets of siblings:

A girl and two boys (3 all at once .... this would send us for a loop thats for sure)

Two boys ... ages 2 and 3.

A brother and sister.

Things are moving faster now ... maybe we won't be waiting long?

International Adoption - Russia

We went to an international adoption seminar this morning to find out about adopting from Russia. The name of the agency that put on the seminar was called Adoption Horizons. Sounds really great ... expensive ..... but great. Total cost is about $38,000. Got to meet some families that have already gone through the whole process. It was really neat to see but also very emotional. You have to travel to Russia twice. It would be an amazing life experience.